Sickening

It has been far too long but I feel I must capture my current mood somewhere. The more conventional channels seem far too hokey and I worry that It may just seem as though I am prostituting the memory of an old friend for attention.

What a vile situation. That poor girl. I feel it is best to keep the details as vague as possible but I only wish to say I recently lost a friend in one of the most gruesome and despicable ways possible. We were not particularly close but we were friends. And now she is gone. I've lost many friends before but not like this. Sadly I doubt there will be any true carriage of Justice. I am dumbfounded by the whole ordeal. Its so senseless. Yesterday I vomited at work because I read about what was done to her in the papers and then a flush of memories from our days in college. She was so sweet and innocent. Never a mean word about anyone.

And the last time we spoke was by the A,A statue in front of the Library maybe a year ago. Maybe a year and a half. And then this. The word I feel I should be using, intuitively, is "tragic." But this wasn't tragic at all. It is as the scales of fate in this clockwork universe have failed. In a certain way, Oedipus -deserved- his fate. That is a tragedy. Nor is this some ill-fated accident. Something that could have been so easily prevented. No no no. This is a disgusting manifestation of the depravity men are capable of when they abandon their humanity and become slaves to their bestial whims.

What a beautiful world we live in potmarked by these degrading and sinister men who barely even deserve to be called such. It makes me sick. I feel ill.